Saturday, March 13, 2010

Confessions

  1. I hate hockey.  I know, you didn't think there was such a thing as a hockey-hating Canadian, did you?  Well, I do hate it.  With a passion, the likes of which you have never seen before.
  2. I also hate coffee.  I have never had an entire cup, because the first sip always makes me gag.  Therefore, I don't care for Tim Horton's.  (That won't mean anything to anyone who isn't Canadian.  And to the Canadians, it will make me seem *almost* as un-patriotic as my aversion to hockey.)
  3. I don't like to do bad things - the thought makes me queasy.  I have never stolen a thing in my life.  Never.  Not even a candy bar.
  4. I can sit down and eat an entire bag (I'm talking economy-sized) of potato chips without help.  The whole bag, guilt-free.  Not that I'm proud of it...it's more of a morbid fascination with my blatant gluttony.
  5. If I could change one thing about myself (physically), it would be to grow taller.  I am short and I hate it.  Everything else, I can live with.  Even my big feet.
  6. I'm not very good with money.
  7. I can speed read and I am incapable of putting a book down, once I've started.  That means I can't start a book mid-week, or else I won't go to sleep until it's done.
  8. I struggle with insomnia.  As a result, I sleep alone, in my own bed.  This arrangement has saved my flailing-and-snoring husband's life, many times over.  Not to mention our marriage.
  9. I don't wear a wedding band.  Or any rings, for that matter.  I used to retain a LOT of water at night, and when I wore rings, they would cut off the circulation to my fingers (purple fingers are scary, in the morning).  Instead of messing about with putting on/removing of them, I just forgo the whole thing.  (Incidentally, my feel also swell so much overnight that my shoes are *much* tighter in the morning than at the end of the day.)
  10. As a result of #8, I sometimes get questions along the lines of "why isn't a lovely thing like you married?", but always from geriatric men.  In fact, I have never been flirted with by men my own age - always men old enough to be my father (or thereabouts).  I've never understood it and as a teenager, it really creeped me out.
  11. I'm a prude, body-wise.  I can't imagine a more uncomfortable place to be than the locker room (ladies' or men's) of a gym.  I have two step-sisters my age and I've never seen either one naked.  Or even topless.  They've never seen me, either.  It would be a seriously traumatizing experience for all parties involved.  Trish, I'm sure you can back me up on that one.
  12. I hate makeup.  When I wear a tuque, I look like a boy.
  13. If you dropped me off in the middle of Winnipeg (where I spent most of my childhood), I would probably not be able to find my way out.  I learned to drive there, but I have completely forgotten how to navigate the city.
  14. I am French Canadian, but I haven't read a French book in at least 10 years (OH FOR SHAME!!!).
  15. I have never personally owned a TV.
  16. I didn't think "Gangs of New York" was all that violent.  And I didn't really like it, though I would trade my left arm for a chance to meet Daniel Day-Lewis (he's dreamy)(and old enough to be my father...).
That's all I can think of, today.  What about you?  Any confessions you just *have* to get off your chest?

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